Bondage Blog

This has got to be the most awesomest Craigslist resume posting ever: Please discipline codegirl and make her code very difficult AJAX. Three of seven paragraphs:

I don’t want to be a girl dropped into the coding pit to be awed and then broken by Senior PHP engineers wielding grim and terrible caching weapons. Rails engineers by the thousands marching, marching against everyone, on every border while I draw well water shot through with ponderings of the scalability issues with PHP, and how for form to exist in our physical universe it must be have a name. If matter or a form cannot be named, it cannot exist.

I don’t want to fight sexy ATG boys about AJAX performance within droplets, I don’t want to bicker in the morning concerning why JQuery is the proper and correct framework, all the time everytime. It’s ok. I love you guys. I do. I worship you Warcraft playing, contract working, hordes of luscious web men. I know what you love. I want to be there for you.

I will code the HTML you don’t want to. It’s ok. I don’t mind. I like it. I will code it handcuffed if you want. It’s ok. If I’m too slow, or if you check and my adhering to standards is inappropriate or my fumbling, adolescent understanding of the finer point of JSON infuriate you, you can tear my stockings. They were expensive, and I bought them for work. They were my only pair. I am a humble code girl.

The vast Bondage Blog empire could really use a handcuffed HTML minion, oh yes it could. We could even provide discipline. Sadly, we can’t afford a minion of such quality. We shall have to pine, in jealousy of whatever Bay Area coding shop gets her. Kink.com, are you listening?

Thanks to Violet Blue for the link and for the full mirror — which you may need if Craigslist decides this is just too much fun for any one resume to have.

This went by on Spanking Blog a couple of months ago, I’ve been meaning to steal it and so it’s perfect for a fast Friday post:

Elsewhere on Bondage Blog:

• Slave Women Of The Turks
• Kneeling Slavegirls
• Slave Bondage In Ancient Egypt
• Chained And Apprehensive Bondage Slavegirls

This is an image from the movie Deadgirl:

Io9.com says “In a new indie horror flick called Deadgirl, two high school guys find a naked zombie chick tied up in the basement of an abandoned insane asylum, so they invite their pals along to gang rape her.”

I liked the image better before I read the plot summary.

If you grew up and went to the public schools anywhere there was snow, then at some point it’s a cinch that you saw someone get their “face washed out with snow”, or had it happen to you, or maybe even did it to someone else. It can be a breathtakingly unpleasant experience, especially when it’s unexpected; but by the same token, if you have even the least bit of sadism in your soul, there’s a certain charm to doing it. A handful of snow on warm skin is probably the most shocking and dramatic and painful sensory experience, short of actual violence, it’s possible to deliver without special toys and tools. If making girls cry (then or now) is your thing, a handful of snow is your friend.

Why, then, don’t we see more of it in BDSM porn? I blame California, especially the coastal and southern bits where so much U.S. porn is made. Not much snow to be seen there.

This is not — to put it mildly — a problem in Finland, where Chillygirls.com is produced. Snow, they got, and pretty girls in bondage, too:

I think we can safely say that these guys delivered their fair share of face-washings when they were in school:

But the best part is when they start putting the snow down her panties:

Do you think she’s shivering, yet?

Elsewhere on Bondage Blog:

• She Does What She's Told
• Winter Camping: Doing It Wrong?
• Bondage In A Blizzard
• Springtime Snow Bondage
• Getting Cold Feet

I realize he’s probably “just” the crier, charged with bellowing out the supposed offenses of the pretty wenches confined in pillory bondage, to further their public humiliation. To me, though, his posture, positioning, and general air of satisfaction suggest he’s got a rather more personal sort of public humiliation in mind for them:

Probably “in mind” is where he’ll keep it, but the wenches should worry if they see him coming back with a jar of goose grease, or a bit of freshly churned butter.

Image found on UseNet, the font of so many great things.

Elsewhere on Bondage Blog:

• Pillory Sex
• Exposed In The Stocks
• Feet Tickling In The Stocks
• Bondage At The Faire
• Bondage Wives: In The Pillory

I regret to admit that I’m not old enough to have seen much of The Avengers, a TV show from the 1960s, but pictures like this one, of Linda Thorson wearing a convincing (by the standards of television bondage) ankle shackle, make me wish I had:

If her bondage stretches far enough for the lovely Satine Phoenix to reach her tormentor TJ Cummings in this moment, the look on her face tells me she just might try to bite him. He better watch out!

On the other hand, Satine spends most of the shoot extremely well secured, so I guess TJ is safe enough:

Safer than her — what did they used to call it so quaintly? — maidenly honor, that’s for sure! At Fucked and Bound, every day it’s the kinky version of that ancient bit of bawdy doggerel:

She offered her honor,
he honored her offer,
and all through the night,
it was on her and off her!

Elsewhere on Bondage Blog:

• Tip Your Rented Sex-Slave
• Tied And Ready, With Handy Step Stool
• Clipped Nipple
• Helpless Under The Whip
• Fucked And Bound